• Facebook
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • LinkedIn
OCD Coaching Videos
  • Welcome
  • OCD Coaching Videos
  • Book
  • Films
  • Resources
    • Find a Therapist
    • Helpful OCD Links
    • What is OCD?
    • Anxiety Relief Self-Help Tools
    • Spiritual Resources
    • Book: Students with OCD
    • Hope Blog
  • About
    • About James Callner
    • Comments
    • Contact
Select Page
Stronger Than You Think

Stronger Than You Think

by David Dowdy | Mar 14, 2015 | coping with fear, face fear, monkey mind, ocd recovery

Hey! Listen up! There will be times in your recovery when you will say “hey I am getting my life back” Then you get this anxious feeling, what if I fall back into that dark place. I know because it has happened to me more than once. Do not let your heart...
F.E.A.R. = False Evidence Appearing Real

F.E.A.R. = False Evidence Appearing Real

by Jim Callner | Aug 30, 2011 | cbt/erp, coping with fear, monkey mind, ocd recovery

Why has CBT/ERP worked for me and what is F. E.A.R. really? I believe it shifted and literally changed my brain structure and chemistry for the better by changing my distorted belief system caused by the medical condition of OCD. Sounds smart doesn’t it? But, the...

New Book by James Callner

It's a Matter of Trust: Hope & Solutions for OCD and How I Got Better.
Order Here!

LIKE our FB Page

OCD Coaching Videos & Words of Wisdom
OCD Coaching Videos & Words of Wisdom

How to Cope with Unwanted Thoughts – Be the Adult in the Room

How do we cope with unwanted thoughts? This is a question I am often asked. I only write from my own experience and try to encourage hope in all I share, so I will do my best to answer this question for you because it’s an important one.

I had this student in one of my Film/TV Acting classes who was challenging me in every way. This kid was a big bundle of ego, but I was used to that kind of 19-year-old student, having been in the teaching business so long. Once he tried to confront me in my office, he said, "I don't have to rehearse because I don't need to, and I don't need your direction!" I was a 56-year-old veteran teacher with over 30 years of teaching and directing experience, and a teenage student trying to bully me. I smiled to myself as he spoke. I was the adult in the room. When he was finished, I asked him in a calm voice, “Do you know how old I am? How long I have been teaching?" I looked at him directly but calmly and continued, "I'm just too old and tired to deal with this kind of stuff. I’m sure you understand, right?" It stumped him. Again, I was the adult in the room, in control of my emotions and mind. He went back to class and calmed down.

I see coping with unwanted thoughts as essentially the same thing. When the OCD bully creeps in, I remind myself who the adult is and who’s the bully. Am I going to give that bully power or not? Am I going to respond to that thought and give it what it wants, or just let it be, and allow it to burn itself out like that student in my office? I think the practice of coping with thoughts that feel so real is not to try to unthink them, but rather to dis-empower them by bringing out your adult self. Not easy for beginners, but better than blindly reacting to a bully and remaining under their power. Calmly practice being the adult in the room when those unwanted thoughts challenge you. Challenge the bully ignoring and holding firm, no matter what age you are. Be the adult in the room. JC <3
... See MoreSee Less

2 days ago

How to Cope with Unwanted Thoughts – Be the Adult in the Room
 
How do we cope with unwanted thoughts?  This is a question I am often asked. I only write from my own experience and try to encourage hope in all I share, so I will do my best to answer this question for you because it’s an important one.
 
I had this student in one of my Film/TV Acting classes who was challenging me in every way. This kid was a big bundle of ego, but I was used to that kind of 19-year-old student, having been in the teaching business so long. Once he tried to confront me in my office,  he said, I dont have to rehearse because I dont need to, and I dont need your direction! I was a 56-year-old veteran teacher with over 30 years of teaching and directing experience, and a teenage student trying to bully me. I smiled to myself as he spoke. I was the adult in the room. When he was finished, I asked him in a calm voice, “Do you know how old I am? How long I have been teaching? I looked at him directly but calmly and continued, Im just too old and tired to deal with this kind of stuff. I’m sure you understand, right? It stumped him. Again, I was the adult in the room, in control of my emotions and mind. He went back to class and calmed down. 
 
I see coping with unwanted thoughts as essentially the same thing. When the OCD bully creeps in, I remind myself who the adult is and who’s the bully. Am I going to give that bully power or not? Am I going to respond to that thought and give it what it wants, or just let it be, and allow it to burn itself out like that student in my office? I think the practice of coping with thoughts that feel so real is not to try to unthink them, but rather to dis-empower them by bringing out your adult self. Not easy for beginners, but better than blindly reacting to a bully and remaining under their power. Calmly practice being the adult in the room when those unwanted thoughts challenge you. Challenge the bully ignoring and holding firm, no matter what age you are. Be the adult in the room. JC
View on Facebook
·Share

Share on FacebookShare on TwitterShare on Google PlusShare on Linked InShare by Email

  • Likes: 5
  • Shares: 0
  • Comments: 1

 

Comment on Facebook

👌🏼👌🏼👌🏼

OCD Coaching Videos & Words of Wisdom
OCD Coaching Videos & Words of Wisdom

The Opposite of Fear is Trust

What do we trust? Not who, but what? In my experience, I have come to trust that the sun will rise and set even if it’s too cloudy and we can’t see it. I trust that I don't have to think about almost all the functions in my body, as they just work on their own. Lungs, heart, kidneys and liver have worked fine on their own since my birth, so I continue to trust, and do my best to take care of myself.

Though the anxiety of OCD is horrible, can I trust—like I trust in the sun—that the anxiety will calm down on its own, even if I do nothing? The anxiety always calms down eventually, but that's a hard idea to trust. Why don’t more of us, including myself, trust that we will be okay? I believe it’s about rebuilding the trust that OCD robbed us of. If we consistently do a minimal amount of recovery work daily, we will reclaim that trust and be more than okay.

How do you start reclaiming your trust today? Take a tiny baby step towards what you fear daily. After all these years of struggling with fears, I have come firmly to this conclusion. The opposite of fear is trust. OCD is about fear, and trust is about peace. OCD doesn't hold up in the presence of real trust. My goal is to fight life less, and trust life more. It's a minute-by-minute choice to trust, but it can create a lifetime of grace and calm. JC <3
... See MoreSee Less

4 days ago

The Opposite of Fear is Trust
 
What do we trust? Not who, but what? In my experience, I have come to trust that the sun will rise and set even if it’s too cloudy and we can’t see it. I trust that I dont have to think about almost all the functions in my body, as they just work on their own. Lungs, heart, kidneys and liver have worked fine on their own since my birth, so I continue to trust, and do my best to take care of myself. 
 
Though the anxiety of OCD is horrible, can I trust—like I trust in the sun—that the anxiety will calm down on its own, even if I do nothing? The anxiety always calms down eventually, but thats a hard idea to trust. Why don’t more of us, including myself, trust that we will be okay? I believe it’s about rebuilding the trust that OCD robbed us of. If we consistently do a minimal amount of recovery work daily, we will reclaim that trust and be more than okay. 
 
How do you start reclaiming your trust today? Take a tiny baby step towards what you fear daily. After all these years of struggling with fears, I have come firmly to this conclusion. The opposite of fear is trust. OCD is about fear, and trust is about peace. OCD doesnt hold up in the presence of real trust. My goal is to fight life less, and trust life more. Its a minute-by-minute choice to trust, but it can create a lifetime of grace and calm. JC
View on Facebook
·Share

Share on FacebookShare on TwitterShare on Google PlusShare on Linked InShare by Email

  • Likes: 1
  • Shares: 0
  • Comments: 0

 

Comment on Facebook

OCD Coaching Videos & Words of Wisdom OCD Coaching Videos & Words of Wisdom shared Happiness In Your Life's post.
OCD Coaching Videos & Words of Wisdom

Happiness In Your Life
These work!
... See MoreSee Less

6 days ago

PlayHappiness In Your Life
View on Facebook
·Share

Share on FacebookShare on TwitterShare on Google PlusShare on Linked InShare by Email

  • Likes: 0
  • Shares: 2
  • Comments: 0

Comment on Facebook

Load more
View on Facebook

Recent Posts

  • Your Senses vs OCD
  • How to Stop Panic & Anxiety by Breathing
  • OCD and Observing Children – They Will Show You the Truth
  • How to Turn Off a Stove
  • Sunsets & Solutions for Living with OCD

Tags

12 step and ocd anxiety help calm ocd cbt checking creativity driving checking erpt erpt coaching face fears fear hand washing hospitalization ocd compulsion ocd help ocd help from source ocd hospitalization ocd recovery panic checking pure obsessional ocd self accpetance service spirituality ocd help spiritual quotes

Categories

  • 12 steps for ocd
  • cbt/erp
  • connect with source
  • coping with fear
  • creativity calms ocd
  • erpt
  • face fear
  • monkey mind
  • ocd checking
  • OCD Coaching Videos
  • ocd helpful quotes
  • ocd recovery
  • pure obsessional ocd
  • release control
  • self-acceptance
  • service calms ocd
  • spiritual help for ocd
  • walk to help anxiety

Disclaimer

OCD Coaching Videos are not designed to replace professional OCD Therapy. They are intended to help in the education and coaching for those suffering with OCD. James Callner is an OCD Educator and Coach, teaching from over 35 years of his own recovery experience. The Coaching Videos, Blog Posts and other information on this website are not a replacement for a professional therapist. Mr. Callner contributes his videos to the OCD Treatment Centre in Taunton England. OCD Treatment Centre therapists approve all OCD Coaching Videos. .

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • LinkedIn
Copyright © 2018 OCD Coaching Videos